Ah life.. full of tons of hurdles we are suppose to overcome. No pun intended. Pursuing this dream is most definitely exposing the challenges a professional athlete has to overcome to get to the top. The questioning of why your running, if you ever that caliber of an athlete, when your time is going to come, if ever. As an athlete we put so much faith into that fact that one day all this hard work will be for nothing. We hope that the stars will align in our favor and they will shine down on us and we will run the race we were meant to run.
Competing this season has had tons of ups and downs. It seems like every other race is good, and then there the good bad race that you had because you figure out how to do one thing but then that changed another part of your race so now you have to figure out how to run the race with this new good thing you added to it.
My race in Halifax was that. It was a good bad one. But a frustrating good bad one. It so hard to warm up and feel amazing and think yea… I am about to tear some *shit up. And then do the exact opposite. Hey trail leg you want to catch up with my lead leg ? Oh you don’t feel like getting out of the blocks today? it’s cool I’ll wait. Oh man that movement in between was on point though. To bad your time doesn’t reflect that.
As track athletes in general we are defined by times, distances, medals.. These are the tangible things that can be measured. They restrict us in some aspect of becoming the true athlete we can be. If we could only be defined by will power courage, dedication the world would see how many more great athletes there are out there. And I think I would win in that category every time. HANDS DOWN.
I can’t help to think that at this time in my career I have become weak to letting my time define the type of hurdler I am. Part of me has become so obsessed with breaking 13 that I’ve lost the fun part. And it not that I don’t think I can .. It’s I know I can… At the end of the day it’s just a number, a reference or a bookmark of success, an important one. But I think if I want to get there I need to forget it. And go back to having fun. Because even though I think I’m having fun, I think I lost part of it somewhere along the journey.